Typing Alone with Marilyn Monroe

I shall now, for your viewing pleasure, cite the most notorious conspiracy theories, before your very eyes! I will not mention Watergate, because its obvious, Rosewell, because its ongoing, Kennedy, because its obvious, or Princess Diana, because I'm sick of it, she died, it was terrible, case closed.
Conspiracy #1: Mariliyn Monroe
Let me just say this. Why does every person in this country associate the deaths of beautiful women with cocaine? I mean, obviously, it was cocaine that killed Marilyn, but still. But the reason many people believe she was killed was her association to many...powerful political leaders...such as the Kennedys. Most of this is reflected in the Marilyn Tapes, which may or may not exist, and may or may not contain America's most glamorous movie star doing nasty with America's most glamorous president, and other intriguing episodes. And if anyone is offended by that, come on! The Kennedy brothers Jack and Bobby, president and attorney general, were either sleeping with her, or talking dirty on the phone with her, but that doesn't mean that they killed her. But it doesn't mean they didn't, I will admit, MANY people involved in the investigation were acting shady. No conclusion.
Conspiracy Theory #2: Pan Am Flight 103
This conspiracy theory, is one of the most intriguing I've ever heard of. Here's the story: 1988, Pan Am Flight 747 was ripped from the sky by a wad of plastic explosives. Was it just a crazy random happenstance that five CIA agents were on board? Was it also coincidence that another squad of CIA agents showed up at the scene of the accident, and later walked away with a mysterious briefcase belonging to one of the deceased? Or maybe perhaps the half million dollars in cash found on the scene? I. Call. BULLCRAP. This was NOT a random event, and many various cults, satanic worship groups, Libyan terrorists, and the CIA itself, have been considered as the culprits. In my opinion, it was all the CIA, I mean really. Look at this! This was a MASS. MURDER. And to me, the only people that could be responsible, are the CIA. Case Closed.
Conspiracy Theory #3: The Moon Landing of 1969
Uh...yeah, I'd like to point this out to all people who believe this theory. We. Landed. On. The. MOON. Thats about it, we didn't lie, it really happened. Case Closed.
Conspiracy Theory #4: Jesus
I don't even know how to feel about this one. The DaVinci Code is one of my favorite movies, and it has some very interesting theories, but I can't call a conclusion on this one because alot of the facts are obscured, and I won't even go into the entire Priory of Zion, because it is a little far fetched, but I won't draw a complete answer. No Conclusion.
Conspiracy Theory #5: The Jonestown Massacre
This ahs to be one of the most tragic, and most terrifying stories I've ever heard. Story: On November 18, 1978, in a cleared out patch of Guyanese jungle, the Reverend Jim Jones ordered the 913 of his followers to drink Kool Aid laced with cyanide, and they did. There was one survivor. Many believe that Jonestown was the result of human mind control testing, genocide, and the appearance of our old friends the CIA, some even believed that Jonestown WAS the CIA, although that claim has been debunked as ridiculous. I myself believe that it was just the result of a madman and alot of willing followers, and thats all, no CIA. and no government involvement. Case Closed.

Beatles: Standing in the dock at Southampton Trying to get to Holland or France. The man in the mac said you've got to go back, You know they didn't even give us a chance. Christ! You know it ain't easy, You know how hard it can be. The way things are going, They're going to crucify me.